Tell me how ... to stay safe on Halloween

My friend Sage loves Halloween. Loves, loves, loves, loves, loves it. I love that she loves Halloween. But me? Eh, it's all right.

Part of my apathy may be the way my family celebrated Halloween -- reluctantly, just like every other holiday. As kids we could go trick-or-treating, but only until we were 12. (Age 12 was the cut-off for all holidays -- no more trick-or-treating, no more Easter gifts, and if we hadn't figured out the deal with Santa Claus by then we were swiftly educated.) And trick-or-treating was basically parading to the great-grandparents' home for our annual visit, then padding along the cold streets of Iona, hitting maybe three or four blocks before giving up and heading home.

Things temporarily improved when we got home -- Mom was there waiting with some apple cider warmed over the stove and some doughnuts from Albertsons. But that, too, was short-lived as we each sipped the cider and remembered none of us really liked it. (No one tell my mother that -- to this day she thinks we all loved it.) And then the worst of all -- the candy cuts. See, my father reasoned that since he was the one who drove us about a mile and a half and then pushed us out in the cold to fend for ourselves, that meant he deserved a piece of the treats action. A big piece -- 1/3, to be exact. Given his three daughters, that meant each year he walked away with the whole pie while we each had just 2/3 of our stash left.

He didn't just take a big chunk of our candy. He always took the GOOD candy and left us with the Dum Dum suckers and individually wrapped Life Savers. I went on a good 5 year stretch where I never got a single bit of a Snickers bar, even though those were my absolute favorite.

Yeah, Halloween wasn't really my thing.

I am all about recreating my crappy childhood for my kids. In fact, I'm thrilled about it.

So, after visiting the great grandparents, we'll be out trick-or-treating this year (and for another 9 years for Nelly ... if she's lucky). But as we're out padding along in the cold, I could really use a refresher on the safety precautions. And maybe some of you could, too.

Dear readers, tell me how to stay safe on Halloween. Are you supposed to take your candy to the hospital to be x-rayed or something? Is that still a thing? Was that ever actually a thing? What should the kids have on them? Reflectors? Pepper spray? What are the scary things and what are the almost definitely safe things to let them eat?

Don't give me horror stories -- that's the other part of Halloween I don't like. But if you've got some good counsel on precautions to take on this spooky holiday I'd absolutely love to have them.